If you’re a positive, loving and self-motivated person, you may wonder why some people don’t like you, or have ended friendships with you.
Here is the most common reason why:
1. The Self-Determined make the un-Self-Determined Uncomfortable.
For example: the fit person makes the fat person uncomfortable.
The fit person is usually unaware of the effect he has on the fat person, but the fat person feels compelled to compare themselves to the fit person – they’re forced to look at themselves – and they don’t like what they see!
So what do they do? They blame the “messenger” (the fit person) by thinking up reasons for not liking them. For example, they’ll say the fit person is vain or egotistical. Or if you’re somewhat successful, they’ll say you’re greedy.
When in reality, the fit person has Determined Himself to be Fit. Same things with the successful person.
He went within himself and then set his eyes on the goal of fitness, and proceeded toward that goal, refusing to make excuses, and adjusting his approach as necessary to achieve a victorious outcome.
The fat person gave up their self-determinism to external forces – sedentary lifestyle, unhealthy eating habits, confused thinking, etc. And rather than take on self-determinism (self-responsibility) in the matter – they make “excuses” and find consolation in having someone they can point at with a finger of dislike. That way they don’t have to look at themselves (it’s too uncomfortable!)
Make sense so far?
Wikipedia defines Self-determination is defined as free choice of one’s own acts without external compulsion.
The Self-Determined man (or woman, get over it) chooses his own course of life, and more often achieves his goals and has an enormous amount of freedom. He DEFINES HIMSELF by his own conscience, intuition, understanding, goals and objectives.
The Un-Self-Determined person is defined by things outside of himself – his boss, his job, his feelings, his emotions, his pride, his desires, his ego, his confused thinking – all things that are in fact external forces directing him.
So realize that if people don’t like you, bless them! They’re letting you know you’re on the right track, and they simply aren’t ready to be self-determined yet themselves.
Press on to your Higher Calling as a Warrior, it get’s a little lonely at the top, but God is always with you, and so are those with a pure and un-selfish heart!
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points
out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have
done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the
arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives
valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is
no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive
to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who
spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the
triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at
least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with
those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” – Theodore Roosevelt
Your Friend in Good Success,
Scott Bolan